Slaughterhouse Death

The cheesy keep calm poster for the tired and typical

Growing old is a permanent thing. There is nothing to do except to prepare for the inevitable onslaught of Mother Nature. The ravaging beast of noxious Time allows none to escape.

And yes you can prepare. You can slow it down. You can diet and train and exercise your intellect and body. You can go organic, veggie or full on vegan. You can eat the sweetest of the sweet meats and gulp vitamins galore. [Read more...]

The times they are a changin’

speech night

I had my first speaking engagement during the week. It’s true. I spoke with my wife about the life we have had for the last few years. I basically spent over an hour big noting myself. It was great. I got a serious buzz from it. [Read more...]

The Metaphor of Incontinence

in the hazed future, the autistic reign supreme

I dream of a day in the future. In this day I will be balder, wrinklier and flabbier. My words will roll into each other and saliva will spill out with each vowel I wispily rasp. I will shake a shaky fist at the dandiest young kids who don’t give a fuck about old gramps. And I will have trouble keeping my guts in my intestines. [Read more...]

Interview With Billy Connolly

billy connolly

So I sit down with the wife at a café in a small seaside town called Tulum in Mexico. The café is nice and busy with a band playing local music. We sit down looking out to the street. A high globe of sun pours its heat onto planet Earth. I order a coffee and a juice.

As I look around an old wild looking American man I had said hello to earlier walks past. He is wearing short [Read more...]

Boring Sobriety

Being sober is so boring that balancing an egg is exciting

Jesus. Bloggers. What a shower we are. With our daily, weekly or otherwise challenges. Point to note: no one gives a monkeys what you do! All these proclamations of this, that and the other. Read the news – no one cares!

Except for the fans of course. And the people who want to be bloggers. And your mother, if she remembers you still have the blog.

So my challenge this year is to write once a week for Sober Paddy, twice a week for Five Point Five and some guest blogs for other sites thrown in. On top of that there is the book I am working on which requires 3,000 words per week. Ahem. [Read more...]

Today is the Day

Dalai Lama

Ah the New Year. It comes around so soon….so many memories from the last and dreams for the current. What will happen? Who will win? How will I do? It is impossible to know the future, but you can prepare for success. And shit loads of it.

I saw a recent comment here and some guy said..” this all sounds too much like some ‘life coachery’ stuff which makes me cringe , ( just some thaughts ,fly on the wall stuff , )”.

I freakin’ cringed myself reading that. Is that what I had become? Over the course of 4 years writing here I have shocked, thrilled, disappointed, inspired, saddened, bored and amused – but I never thought someone would take me for a “life coachery” type of guy. [Read more...]